After weening Sophia off the swaddle at 4 1/2 months I can remember at least a few nights of sleeping in the crib. Soon it became next to impossible to get her to sleep. So one night I stuck her in the car seat and she surprisingly almost slept through the night. This was crazy. I felt like a horrible mom for letting her sleep in there though. I though it might hurt her or cause other abnormalities...I don't know- my mind wonders. Any how, I loved the sleep I got that night. It felt amazing and I woke up refreshed for the first time in a very long time. Josh thought it was fine to let her sleep in the car seat. He kept saying, "we do what we have to." I guess it made me feel a little better, but I still had doubts. After about a week of this - I was still getting great sleep. She was too. I started to google other mother's post about how they went through the same thing and how their baby just 'stopped' one day around 6 months. So I thought well I have a month or so....
And the car seat sleeping continued for another month or so until one night it became extremely difficult to keep her asleep. She was waking up maybe 10 times a night or more. This was horrible. So I thought she must be ready for the crib. I was VERY wrong. She didn't like the crib at all. She would scream as soon as I attempted to lay her down. UGH. I tried 4 to 5 times - where I would nurse her to sleep and tried to transfer her to the crib....no dice. So I tried back in the car seat only to be awaken 30 mins later. Holy crap. I've created a monster.
What the hell am I supposed to do. She won't sleep in her crib, car seat, my bed, ugh. At this point I ordered all the sleep training books I could get my hands on. Which my mother still makes fun of me. "You kids now a days, you do all the research, we didn't have these Internet articles and books. We parented on instinct. She'll tell you what she needs." This sounded reasonable, but I kept reading. I needed a solution. My life sucked.
There were about six or seven different philosophies/theories on sleep training. There were only two that stood out to me - NO cry solution and cry it out. I read both and decided to try some of the NO cry techniques. They helped a little. We tried to have play time in the crib to create good sleep associations with being in the crib. We also tried to make our night time routine a little longer and more soothing. It all sounded good. It helped a little, but not enough.
Doctor Richard Ferber's Solve Your Child's Sleep Problems, seemed logical and a little harsh. I didn't care at this point. I was willing to try anything. His Progressive waiting approach: putting the baby to bed awake and check on them with increasing intervals. Your job is to reassure them - not make them stop crying or help put them to sleep. They need to learn to fall asleep on their own so when they wake up throughout the night they are able to put themselves back to sleep. By the third or fourth night they should be sleeping very well. I thought no way in hell this is going to work with my cranky baby. She is WAY to stubborn.
The first night she cried like I've never heard her cry. It was painful. Awful. Worse than labor and delivery. I cried. Josh stayed strong and said this needed to be done. After an hour and forty-five minutes I caved and picked her up and nursed her to sleep. I put her in the car seat. This was too hard. I was an emotional wreck. I wanted her to sleep, but this didn't seem right. I thought EFF Ferber.
That next morning I spoke to my friend Ashley about my experience - which her baby had been sleeping through the night since she was 2 months. So she didn't really know where I was coming from, but I took advice from her anyway. She said it takes 72 hours to change a behavior. She thought I should continue and if I make it an hour and 46 mins than consider it a success. ugh.
I thought about it and decided to stay strong and continue. The second night she cried for an hour and 15 mins and put herself to sleep. I'm sure from pure exhaustion, but it worked. However, she kept getting stuck in the crib rails. We would untangle her and place her on her back each time. She fell asleep on her tummy. I asked Josh if we should flip her over. He said, "are you effing crazy? She's fine!" I made him sneak up to the room and check to see if she was still breathing. We couldn't tell from the monitor. She was fine. Third night 50 mins, but continued waking several times at night. Alright. I had enough. Ashley had also mentioned that they had a breathable bumper - "it's worth every penny." So I placed an order online. 4 days for delivery. Those 4 days were the longest days. Sleeping got worse. I'm sure it's because she was confused. Like where am I supposed to sleep!?!? WTF.
I explained to Josh that as soon as the bumper arrived we would start fresh and I promise I would follow through. He didn't believe me, but he was on board anyway. I tracked the package and delivery day was here. I watched out the window all day for that FedEx guy. Finally at 5:15pm (right before tubby time) it was here. I installed it quickly and started my routine.
She cried for an hour and forty-five mins and fell asleep. Slept until 10:30pm. I nursed her and put her back in the crib. She cried for 15 mins and fell asleep until 2:30am. Changed her, nursed her and put her back in the crib. She cried for 5 mins and fell asleep until 6:30am. Wow. Not as bad as I expected. Ok. Now for nap time. I was stressed (as usual). How was this going to work? It's not as dark and she's not as tired. This isn't going to work. Oh well. I tried it anyway - since I was on a mission. She cried for 25 mins and slept for two hours and ten mins. Holy shit. She's never napped that long. I was impressed. This is going to work. From that moment on - I knew there was a light at the end of the tunnel.
We are now on night 4. She cried for 30 mins and woke up 3 times with literally no cryng at all. She rolls over and goes to sleep. Who is this baby. It's nuts. And for her naps she cries for about 10 mins and sleeps for 1 1/2 - 2 hours (morning nap and afternoon nap). I just can't believe how well this has worked. I am a believer. Ferber follower - I guess. I highly recommend this sleep training method.
My sister-in-law said, "crying never killed a baby." She's right. All that crying the first night was worth getting to all this great sleep - that she desperately needed.
Here are my suggestions though....
Must have breathable bumper, get mentally prepared, and be consistent. It will work.
Sitting Up
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